One Life To Live.

Remember that show? I remember seeing it for a while. But, I'm not huge on television viewing.

One life to live. That's all we have. We have received this one time gift and we are in complete control on how we use it.

The recent death of a loved one has made me ponder a lot deeper on life and how its end is guaranteed. I was very hurt as I expressed in one of my latest posts, however I like to find purpose in all.

Everything and everyone on Earth is temporary. Let that sink in. I feel like we know this but don't feel it, until death comes and bites you in the ---. The point is, I think the purpose of this painful time for my loved ones and myself is to evaluate what is truly important in this life.

I ask myself, what do I devote most of my time doing? How am I treating others? How can I give more of myself? Are there things that God is calling me to do that I'm not doing? Is there a change in my lifestyle that should be made?

One life to live. I don't want to think that I'll leave this broken world without leaving any meaningful footsteps on it. Forget being mediocre. I want to fulfill my purpose and this loss has allowed me to grasp the reality of death. The reality that this will soon cease. And every second is precious.

You, reading... Is there something you have to say to someone? Is there someone you have to forgive? Is there someone you need to express your love to? Is there something you have to confess? Do you have an idea that might make a difference?

One life to live. Let that sink in.

Spiritual Droplets

Follow my new blog. Spiritual Droplets. Reflect on God today.
http://spiritualdroplet.blogspot.com/2011/06/first-droplet-love.html

Good Bye Beauty

My heart has been torn.
The ache is great in pain.

She was beautiful.
Her smile was pleasant.

Today she no longer is.
And it hurts.

Two decades of life.
Sweet but extremely sour.

Ease my soul, God.
I trust she is shining with you now.

Rest in peace.
Goodbye beauty.
I'm looking forward to meeting you.
Hasta luego...

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Lessons are to be learned.
Pray at all times.
Appreciate at all times.
Love at all times.
Forgive at all times.
Respond to God at all times.
Fulfill your purpose.
You don't know when it's over.



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I love you, LORD, my strength. The LORD is my rock, my fortress and my deliverer; my God is my rock, in whom I take refuge, my shield and the horn of my salvation, my stronghold. As for God, his way is perfect: The LORD’s word is flawless; he shields all who take refuge in him. Psalms 18:1-2,30

The "P" Word

Process.

I am going through a process. Others may not realize that they too are going through a process. Process, process, process. This is a word that has been after me for a while. I have learned that instead of running away from the term, I would understand the importance of it.

Process. Think about it. Everything around you, in some way or another makes you who you are. The people, the situation, the circumstances, the perspectives, the lifestyles, the beliefs. Everything that happens, everyone you meet, everything you see, everything you hear is part of this "process."

You may not like the idea of being "processed." I think that now more than ever, we enjoy everything being instant. That's why we've made microwaves, email, texting, etc.  And I bet that if someone invented something that reads our minds, without havng to click any buttons, we'd buy it in a heart beat.

Unfortunately, even though we are privileged to have these instant gadgets, we are the same as earlier generations. We aren't born with defined personalities and perspectives. Each day, each minute, each second produces something new in us.

All lives are complex and are being processed. However, it is something more profound when you know that you are being processed by something or someone beyond our human understanding.

I have learned that God is behind my every move. I believe that he puts things in my path to teach me something new. And everything is for my very own good. Every step of this process is to help me have the heart and lifestyle that He desires for me.

Like the song, Blessings by Laura Story. It says, "Cause what if Your blessings come through raindrops What if Your healing comes through tears, What if a thousand sleepless nights, Are what it takes to know You’re near, What if trials of this life are Your mercies in disguise.."

It may be raindrops, tears, sleepless nights that bring you closer to God and help you understand Him and what he desires for you. Sometimes it can be a friend, a relationship, a conversation, an attitude, a trip or a part of scripture.

The "P" word.

Process. It is no longer an idea that I am uncomfortable wth. Instead I welcome God to continue to process me and find His way to the center of my life. I ask Him to help me understand what I need to change or what I need to learn from everything that surrounds me. Remember that everything has a purpose, even the fact that you are still reading this blog post.

Is there something that you need to notice in your life? Is God processing you in this very moment? Be joyful in the process and remember that at the end of the road is victory.

   Job 11:7

"Can you search out the deep things of God?
Can you find out the limits of the Almighty?"

It's a process.

Let that sink in.

My Experience at an “Alcoholics Anonymous” Meeting

(I had to go to an AA for my Addiction Studies course, I wrote this paper as proof of attendance for my professor. I should've posted this earlier but end of semester things got in the way....enjoy)

It was Monday, May 2^nd . I was stressed because I thought that I wasn’t going to be able to go to a meeting, on time for this assignment. And honestly, with all the work I have to get done for the end of the semester I was not looking forward to this assignment either. I thought that one hour at this meeting was going to be a waste of my life.

A close friend of mine referred me to one at the Calvary Baptist church right near campus. So I went and dragged a close relative with me because I was scared and didn’t know what to expect. We got there it was like a little alley way on the side of the church. And I see old people, middle aged people and a young man too. Everyone was friendly and said hello and asked if it was the first time. I laughed because someone asked me so are you an alcoholic? And in my head I’m like “Oh my do I look like one”? But, what do you expect standing outside the door of an AA meeting.

One lady there who actually led the meeting said something like “Yeah, going through an ugly divorce with a bad man and its all bad. But it’s all about staying sober you know..” Right then and there I knew that this meeting was important to some people.

So after a while of standing outside my relative and I entered the room. There was a table in the front and there were chairs lined up in front. On the side there was a table with coffee. Everyone took coffee! I guess it’s an equivalent to the alcohol, because a lot of the people came in with cups from Dunkin Donuts.

To my surprise I then saw Robert who had talked in the class, everyone was really happy to see him. And he hugged everyone, at that moment I saw true fellowship.

My relative and I sat down, they had a twelve step and traditions book on the seats and my relative started reading it while we waited for the meeting to start.

And at 5:15, “Happy Hour” started, that was humorous. They started saying the steps, traditions, the serenity prayer and asked questions like is this your first time? Or something about thirty days and who can be a sponsor.

I introduced myself and so did my relative, the “HI CRISTINA” chanted by the crowd was a little weird but everyone just looked happy to help, I sensed a real community.

They read a chapter from the book about the third tradition I think. It was something about the only requirement is to want to stop drinking. It was interesting but I didn’t feel like I belonged because I’m not a drinker.

And then the exciting part was the open part just to talk… I was surprised to see that after the person said now you’re free to talk. The person who got up was my relative. I knew this person had used all sorts of substances when he was in his home land before becoming a Christian but I had not linked the two things together.

He was nervous I could tell because his accent was worse than ever but you could still understand what he was saying. He spoke about his experience with alcohol and other drugs. And how now it’s been 20 years of him being clean and having “one woman” (everyone laughed). He said that what made the difference in his life was finding Jesus. A pastor went to his house preaching but he didn’t want to tell anyone that in his heart he asked God that if he was real to forgive him. And since that day everything changed.  I began to cry because I know from personal experience that God is real and that my relative does not struggle with alcohol or anything else anymore but he took the opportunity to talk about Jesus to these people who were trying to overcome this addiction.

Others after him agreed with relative that it wasn’t until they found a higher power to help them they couldn’t have done it because they needed the power of someone else.

But there was one man that made me want to just sob on my knees and pray to God. He said something like, “Every day I struggle and I read the 2^nd step (I think that was it about finding a higher power). And I find myself with the bible on one side and the bullet on the other. I try to read but it makes no effect and I just want to end my life, there’s no point. I’m done.”

Someone in front of my eyes wanted to commit suicide because alcohol has destroyed their life. I cried and realized that God made my heart sensitive to these people. I never experienced something like this live! And I noticed that these people need to be prayed for. And as a Christian I saw the need that these people had of finding forgiveness and healing through Jesus. I cried and cried because I know that God does not create life for no reason, each person has a purpose.

Several people responded to this man. One that stood out to me was one that said, “you know what, I know you’re in a tough spot, I was there. But I lost my wife because of alcohol. I never thought alcohol could do that but it did. And instead of me trying to do something about her death, I’m trying to do something about me, by stopping. And it’s hard but I take it day by day…”

This A.A meeting has changed my life. It has given me another reason to pray for, opened my eyes to the real brokenness that addiction produces. May God find his way into their hearts and allow them to find healing.

Like the strings of a guitar.

Each string of a guitar makes a sound and has the potential to make other sounds as well. The pressure put upon the strings by our fingers, create a distinct tone. With the correct and precise combination of tones, we make pleasant chords and create music. But it depends on the guitar player to vary the sounds of each string.In a strange way life can be compared to guitar strings. When I think about this comparison I think about the things each person has and what they decide to do with them. Things like: people in your life, money, education, health, belief etc.What do we make of it? As a guitarist you must wander and try to discover new sounds to make a melodious tune. With the right combination you might just get the right sound.Every aspect of our life is not be ignored and left untouched but it should be explored for its potentiality.We should use our creativity to produce harmony. What do you do with what you have? How do you relate to those who are around you? In what do you invest your resources? How can you manage all aspects to make a song..? I am learning how to play the guitar now and it’s so amazing to become familiar with its structure and how you can make the same chords in different forms. Good music is offered throughout all of it frets. So is life, we just have to learn the tricks with its strings.

What's Wrong with Pretty?

It's not always real.

Often times when life brings about a hard situation or simply an unwanted one, I calm myself with indifference.

 Imagine yourself being cut or hurt and not peeping or showing an ounce of pain or discomfort at least.. You're just looking good like if nothing just happened. Take this to the other level, away from the physical..

I’m not sure if I can say I lie to myself saying that I’m fine. But I extremely dislike seeming dysfunctional or not put together.

Once when I took an interest assessment, the interpreter told me “Hmmm you like things to look nice, don’t you?” I have no idea how she perceived that through the results but it’s true. I guess I don’t mind a good image. I think this preference does NOT entail material things only.

Anyway, the point is that … well I don’t know what my point is.

But I remember about a week or two ago at a bible study I regularly attend on campus, we spoke about how it is important to be one person, not showing one thing and being something completely different in the inside.

I don’t argue with the bible or its teachings. If I don’t believe it… well, there goes my faith…

But it’s interesting to me because personally I feel like I’m being told that its normal to not be perfect, just be true to yourself and to others.

So, what’s my closing statement?

Haha… I laugh because this is truly hard to say since I often times convince myself that I’m insensitive or immune to many things. (I think I am sometimes anyway… bear with me I’m still confused)

Dear World,

 I have “feelings” (OMG this is unbearably girly). Everything isn’t always okay. I’m learning that there is a difference between accepting situations rather than just putting it in the junk/ignore pile.

Sincerely,

Whispered by honesty and acceptance

The value of honesty is truly immeasurable

This is what we shouldn't be ... Ha ha



Be Silent

Many times when we look for answers, we speak a lot.

We search and we don't find.

 This is because, we don't stop to think and listen.

What we need may be right at sight, but in the midst of noise and fog it's impossible to see or hear.

Take a time to stop. To think. To reflect. To listen.

Maybe, just maybe, you'll find what you're looking for.

Wisdom is always at our reach.

In the attitude of silence the soul finds the path in a clearer light, and what is elusive and deceptive resolves itself into crystal clearness.  Our life is a long and arduous quest after Truth.  ~Mahatma Gandhi

There is a time for everything... a time to be silent and a time to speak.
Ecclesiastes 3:1,7

Underestimation of Tears

Not showing emotion was pretty much what I was taught to do growing up. Why? HMM, that's a hard question I just asked myself. I'd have to say that it might have been to teach me to be stronger, realistic and I'm not sure what else.

However, in a sense I feel that showing emotions have been underestimated, it shows weakness to many but in reality it is a part of our human nature.

Haven't we always heard things like, "Men don't cry." Or sexist remarks such as, "You cry like a girl."

Not that I'm old or anything, but ever since I can remember tears have always been linked with lack of strength.

In a way, I do comprehend that having control over your emotions is essential to growing up but always bottling them up isn't healthy either.

Like I had mentioned in my earlier post, Equilibrium: we need to find balance in these things.

I remember when I was younger, after being yelled at or punished I was forbidden to let ONE tear, drop. Does that sound traumatizing? It probably does but its outcome has been sweet and sour.

For one, I understand that on some occasions or places, tears are probably not appropriate. First thing that comes to mind is the work place. When I apply for jobs online and they have assessments they always ask questions like, "Can people easily tell if you're upset?" I'm guessing the answer they want to hear is no.

Also, in relationships sometimes it isn't a good thing to put yourself completely out there. If you're showing every bit of pain, I think that would just be unbearable.

Again, I insist its finding a balance.


On the other hand, being "trained" to not cry obviously makes it difficult for me to actually cry at times. I'm a girl, this doesn't include chick flicks and depressing world issues. (Ha ha, I have a heart)  I'm referring to just troubles, stress, depression, sadness, anger etc.. Something that is actually serious...  In my case, I tend to bottle that in. As I ponder on this idea, I guess it is just a sense of protecting myself and not letting others see that I can be fragile at times. But, after a certain degree (I can't say I know the exact measure) talking, writing, reading, running, anything that you can possibly do to vent, isn't enough.



Tears are underestimated.

It may take a few sobs here and there to feel relieved or a little less weight.

I hadn't cried in forever, things were just piling up.

My cheeks were going through a drought. And the back of my eyes were preparing a thunderstorm.

Today, the simple act of tearing brought healing.

"Perhaps our eyes need to be washed by our tears once in a while, so that we can see Life with a clearer view again.”

- A.T

Bus Driver Enlightenment

Bear with me, I must begin with the nerdy details.


So, if I haven't mentioned already I'm a freshman undergrad studying psychology. I'm a nerd, grades are ridiculously important to me. All A's so far.

However, this semester, as required, I'm taking a History course. I can't stand history!!!!

Point is.. we had our first exam and we got our grades back today. Ready for this?

Nerd got a 7 8. 78!!! 78??? REALLY?????????????? BITE ME!

My gosh, that just ruined my day, I was so disappointed and overwhelmed by the grade. Throughout the day I was just in a "down" mood, even my supervisor noticed. I'm usually bubbly.

So, whatever to make things worse I was supposed to have rehearsal for youth group on Saturday, I need my dad to give me a ride. You would think that in a crappy day the least I can get is a ride home.

Yea...NO! I was stuck taking the bus, that takes forever. I'm from New York City, a bus that takes an hour to get some place, is ....it's plain ol' UNACCEPTABLE.

So, I'm stuck taking the bus. While I wait, I crack like a shell, accidentally, with a friend of mine. I just went on and on, she was nice enough to listen and said some cheesy positive things. She made me smile at least. But, I still felt crappy.

5:17pm: I'm waiting at the bus stop, looking down just thinking. Mind you, the bus stops only when you have direct eye contact with the bus driver. That, didn't happen, my mind was elsewhere.

But, thankfully the driver was nice enough to stop. I'm familiar to him.

I walk in, the usual would be, "Good afternoon, how are you? Can I have a transfer?"

Today, was "Hey." A hey that he probably couldn't even hear.

He responds, "Hola, (he tries to speak Spanish) como estas?" He says it really nice and enthusiastically.

"I'm not happy today." I said to him. And I must confess, I cracked like an egg shell once again.

Who in the world vents with a bus driver!?!?!?

Cristina does.

The point is this simple bus driver had ALOT to say. He was very intelligent actually. It got to the point that I said, "Why the heck are you a bus driver?"

He started telling me about his life and how he used to be a musician and what not. Great story, he's been all over the place! I hope to do the same one day. But, that's not the point.

After talking about my horrid day and his life. He asked, "So, how old are you anyway?"
"I'm 18."

"What? Only eighteen? I thought you were like twenty something."

I said thank you because people never believe me when I tell them my age. I look younger to 99% of the world.

"Why is that?" I added.

And his response really made my day.

He says something like this, "Well, its the way you carry yourself. You don't act like an eighteen year old of this generation. You carry yourself with respect and dignity. When I see you, you bring.. (he thinks..) You bring faith... hope even....."

My eyes opened wide, "Wow, thank you that means a lot to me."

I had also said, "That's God working in my life." But I don't think he heard me say that with traffic noise.

I was really happy though, to know that in some way I marked a difference and I stood out to a simple, bus driver. I mean, do we really think about who we're influencing around us.

This week, I was able to read a bible passage with good friends of mine from school. It was the "You are the salt of the world...You are the light of the world" passage.

And as I sat on the second bus to finally get home, I made the connection. One of the things my friends pointed out was, "Jesus didn't say you will be the light... he said you are.." And I thought to myself, Wow!
Without realizing, I was shining and I stood out to this man. I was different, I am the light...

It was so great to be able to connect the dots, it made me smile. However, I still wasn't very happy. When I finally got home, I got my dog's leash and took him for a run. I just needed to breath and think.

I go to the park, accompanied by my furry friend and sat under the naked winter branches. The sun was setting, it was pretty..

I stopped and prayed out loud..

"God, you say to be thankful for everything. So, thank you even though it hasn't been the best day. And thank you because this situation allowed me to have that talk with the bus driver... What you say, goes, and yes I am light..."

That was incredibly meaningful and great. I'm really joyous to see God working in my life. Even though I'm still not accepting a "C" as an exam grade, I know God is in control of everything...

He's the man.

He is the reason why I shine.

Overwhelmed by Pro Choice

This semester I'm taking a course called, Medical Moral Theology. And of course, as you might infer we will be debating on controversial health related topics. Topics such as, stem cell research, cloning, health care reform,euthanasia and last but not least: ABORTION.

We were deciding what teams we would be a part of and I really hoped to argue against abortion. However, too many people wanted to be part of that debate team and I wasn't chosen.

The reason why I wanted or still want to be part of that debate team is because one time in my church a PRO LIFE organization/ministry came to talk about their concerns and essentially their take on abortion.
Mind you, before I attended this informative session I was totally for abortion.

I would say things like, "So if I ended up pregnant and I haven't finished school and I'm just not ready to raise a child, I'll just get an abortion...No biggie."

I didn't think it was harmful in anyway. It was simply little spermie and eggy thingies together making some weird chemical things happen, bla not important...GET IT OUT!

However, the speakers that went to my church started talking about it more in depth. Topics like : what are the procedures like, what are the psychological effects that a woman has after an abortion, the health risks of abortion and details about stages of pregnancy that make us understand that from the very beginning of conception a human is being formed and the miracle of life has initiated.

The information was very powerful and meaningful. But it wasn't until they showed videos of each abortion method that I knew I was SO wrong. Seeing tiny humans all bloody and broken killed me. You could already see tiny fingers and a tiny head! But there was one video that showed how doctors insert some sort of apparatus and crush the unborn baby's head in order to get it out of the mother's womb.

I wish I could say I teared, but that isn't enough. I felt so much pain and guilt and confusion, I was crying uncontrollably. My friend who was next to me who knew my initial perspective had to hold me close and console me. I felt sorry that I even considered that to be OK.

It doesn't matter how small in size, a life is huge in value and no one should kill a life for no reason.

Well back to my course dilemma, so regardless that I didn't get into the debate team I came home and started doing some research. I found a link that was PRO CHOICE, meaning for abortion. And my heart sank as I read their ideas about abortion. It seemed to be an outreach for teenagers by the way.

 So they listed reasons why you may consider having an abortion and one of them went something like this, "Having a baby will screw up my life because I haven't finished school and found a career" and "my parents would be disappointed."

I was so deeply overwhelmed by that, how could you possibly say a baby will "screw" me up. That sounds so wrong. But those reasons were nothing, their closing statement got to me even harder.

"Any reason we have for choosing abortion is a good reason. These are our bodies and our lives. No one has the right to force us to have a baby, or to punish us for liking sex."

After I read that statement, I felt embarrassed to be part of humanity. My eyes were opened, I truly perceived how broken and messed up our world is. I am ashamed.

My responses to these ridiculous arguments are
A) If you haven't finished school or found a career: AVOID BECOMING PREGNANT. Birth control and abstinence will do. If you can't handle the consequences of your actions just don't do it!

B) If you're concerned that your parents would be disappointed about you having a child, they're are probably disappointed that you're having sex. Think before you act! And disappointment is part of life, MURDER should not.

C) Having a baby is not a punishment, its the cycle of life. Be smart about sex. Intercourse is the formula to make a child, understand that, let it sink in if it hasn't already.

D) Any reason for murder is not okay. Sure, it is your body but is it really your life? Think about it.

I have refrained myself from responding disrespectfully as I would naturally feeling this angry and disappointed, but its not about pointing a finger and saying you're wrong, its about giving a hand and showing what's right.

My thoughts exclude more difficult and complex situation such a rape or mother's at risk of death. I'm not sure about those. But people having sex and not wanting to deal with their consequences, JUST BECAUSE, is simply not acceptable to my understanding.

Just to mention a few effects on women who have abortions: many seek psychological help afterwards, depression is a big one, women often get hung up on the whole baby idea "My baby would've been born on..." or feel sad when near baby clothing, toys etc.

The PHYSICAL effects are also something important to take in consideration. Many women after having surgical abortions have trouble having children, sometimes their bodies would perform natural abortions and experience other complications in their reproductive system.

So, I'm totally PRO LIFE. And it is sickening to see how people do not value the lives of small people! It's selfish, damaging and it's just NOT our call to decide whether someone has the opportunity to experience human life at its maximum potential!

After feeling so disappointed in HUMANITY and our broken and damaged ways, I am convinced that only GOD can heal and redeem. We are his instruments, we must SPEAK and let ourselves be used by him.

If you would like to see one of the strong videos I have seen regarding this concern go to: http://www.massmediamail.com/durarealidad/

THE IMAGE BELOW MAY BE DISTURBING TO YOU, DO NOT SCROLL DOWN IF YOU HAVE BAD REACTIONS TO HEART BREAKING IMAGES.

She decided that "it" would "screw" up her life, so look at what she did.

"I've noticed that everyone who is for ABORTION has already been born."

- Ronald Reagan

All images on this blog have been googled, I do not own them.

Insatiable you are, mankind.

Insatiable, was the word my friend used to describe mankind. Amazing word, very strong and precise.

Insatiable, impossible to satisfy, always wants more. This is so true. For some reason or the other most people have the habit of wanting more than they already have, better yet : more than necessary.

Why is that? I think that the previous statement can not be fought against. Gosh is humanity so thirsty and so hungry!! Desperation seeps within each cell of our body when trying to find wholeness/completion or never ending satisfaction.

There are so many ways of tackling this subject. We can say we're not "grateful," but that's more of a justification. How about looking at it this way, there is a piece inside of you that is actually missing its pair?

What is it that each person deep inside longs for? How do we experience the state of wholeness, separating from the overpopulated state of EMPTINESS or NEED.

Think back for a moment, do you even know what that feels like?

I try not to be biased in my writing, but what the heck! It's my blog..

In moments of deep insight and connection with God and my spiritual being, I have experienced times where I have felt that I need nothing, for God completes me. He is living water. As the "Big JC"  (Jesus) said, "But those who drink of the water that I will give them will never be thirsty..." [In the gospel of John]


That's me though... But what else can possibly fill the vacancy in your life that is always being bombarded with new materials, new relationships, new success...

Mankind is more complex than material gain, I HOPE!

It's like saving for something you really really really really want!

Example:   Growing up in the Big Apple, the great New York City. Filled with ambition, opportunity, busy life, social pressure etc.. One of the big things growing up there is the obvious and ridiculous pressure in IMAGE. Style, clothing brands, shoes, hair! I look back now and I am in awe at how I was so influenced by the norms that God know who established ! I longed for a different pair of sneakers like every other week. I would save save save. I thought having the right image would complete me. But after getting whatever shoe I wanted ... I was happy for a split second. Two days later, a new pair of sneakers were in style... And it was an ongoing cycle. Annoying, yes, expensive, indeed. But it really depicts how we're never fully satisfied for more than a brief moment.

So again, I'd like to think that we, the people (Ha..) are more than that. It's more than material, success, recognition, ambition...

I think that its something deeper that fills the vacancy within us that it is OH SO highlighted in our society...

Our insatiable society...

How can we let that last drop settle and be filled to the brim...?

"Listen. Can you hear it? Thats your life passing by."

So I just read this very enlightening devotional, if you have any care for spiritual growth, crosswalk devotionals are a great medium, google it.

"Listen. Can you hear it? That's your life passing by."

That was a great attention getter. I didn't even feel the need to keep reading. It just shocked me!

Wake up call much?

It kind of connected with what I wrote earlier today about carrying out with our plans. What can we be doing that we aren't?

Life is one, are we making any progress?

I just feel that there is so much each person can do, we have such an amazing potential. Potential to make an impact, on anything really.

But simply, just taking out time time to view our lives and organize ourselves to do things we enjoy.

A good read, a small talk with someone you don't hear from often, a walk? Enjoy the gift that has been given to you. Life that is.

I'm a bit proud of myself, ever since I was really young I knew I wanted to write. I really enjoy myself doing so. So I think this brief time of venting contributes to my inner peace.

So what should you be doing? Or what should you stop doing? Anyone being called to replace..?

Yup, I definitely think so. Look inside of you and ask yourself what would you like to incorporate in your everyday life...

Make it happen, you have the control

Can you hear it?

That's you making a change!

Go for it!

Consistency: The Ultimate Challenge

Today I continue to be at peace.

It made me wonder, how can I manage to stay this way?
I think consistency is difficult for many, including myself. It is so easy for us to want to start something, a goal we'd call it. Especially now after new years. Why is it so hard to stick to things?

If we had the capacity to be consistent (which we do) with our plans or goals, maybe there would be a lot more in the world. Companies, inventions, books, theories, etc. Most of the time we simply don't grasp our ideas, it's a shame.

Can you think of anything you planned to accomplish last year? Did you accomplish it? I'm sure there is at least ONE thing that you didn't accomplish...

We have the tendency to limit ourselves. However challenges should always be welcome in our lives.

Why? Well, if you don't challenge yourself to new things, you'll be stagnant and not grow in anyway. Such as in character, spirituality, resistance, etc.

Bernice Johnson said, "Life's challenges are not supposed to paralyze you, they're supposed to help you discover who you are."

Let's welcome challenges and carry out what we plan. It doesn't necessarily have to be huge, think of a small goal. Be consistent and hold on to it.

As for me, my goal is to be consistent with my spiritual practices and actually grow. Days, months, years pass and we're stationary. Well, this time I want to walk, if not climb my way up, up and away...

Here's a mountain peak. Look at it...

Now stop pondering and start making moves...

Equilibrium

For a while I have been attempting to find a balance in my life, I'm not saying that I have achieved the goal completely but I do feel that I some what have.

Recently I've been struggling with maintaining an equilibrium in relationships. All types, family members, friends, professors and yes, with the opposite sex as well.

How can you achieve to keep everything at a certain level. ---Lets think about what holds a relationship together. Trust, communication, respect, listening, caring and I personally would add, giving. Everytime you or I or we decide to begin a relationship we have to understand that we have to give. Give what you want to recieve. I will give respect, support, care, love and essentially time. Time is everything.

Not so long ago, I was at a conference in Texas for college students looking for God, specifically for Latinos. It was simply amazing. There was a seminar that was precisely about relationships. And one of the speakers highlighted the importance of being the PERSON YOU WANT. If I think about all the traits that I want in a partner, I should make a self evaluation and see if I have those traits. She said, "don't expect to change a person, enter a relationship thinking how will it change you" (for the better of course).

And those words have impacted me and so I try to be better. But what happens when you feel like your giving alot of yourself and the other person doesn't seem to respond equally?

This is where my concerns and my struggle began. Is my effort pointless?

By further questioning and self reflection, I decided to speak. Yes, expression did the work.

I exhort and advise others to just speak, write...even text to the other person, which is not necessarily limited to romantic relationship, this can apply to co workers and best friends.

Sometimes we simply have questions or feel the desire to change something.

We let these thoughts go about our minds and we try to ignore them, or just acccept the situation. What we continously ignore is the possibility that the other person can be feeling the same way. (In psychology we'd probrably call it the false uniqueness effect this would usually refer to abilities, in this context it'd be ideas or thoughts.) With out conveying our ideas nothing will be solved. Let's express ourselves and find balance in our relationships.

I can't gaurantee that it will always work, but it has for me and I am glad to say that my mind is at ease. Today I have been enlightened, reaching temporary yin and yang, equilibrium that is.